What are you really searching for on your travels?
Peace lies within you. All we seek, whether consciously or subconsciously, is peace. I learned that I will never find this ultimate peace outside of myself.
We spend hours, days, weeks, our whole lives searching for something and not realizing that all joy is already inside us.
We look for it through food, relationships, career changes, money...
We spend time repenting for what we've done or blaming others and ourselves for our current situation. We spend time planning the future, in an internal dialogue about what we should and have to do. We spend time judging and comparing ourselves with others, who have, are or do more or better than we think we have, are or do.
This joy and peace that you seek so hard will not be found outside of yourself, I assure you. You eat and then feel hungry again. You do well at work, are promoted, but then you're frustrated again. You make more money, but it's never enough. You spend time on the phone, computer, TV and still don't feel complete.
You distract yourself with friends, work, buying things, activities and even still you aren't happy. You get irritated when something doesn't work out.
We are accustomed to instant gratification: the new text message, food in the fridge, online pornography. Even with all of this, we live in anxiety and worry and we don't feel that ultimate peace.
I learned that this peace lives within us. We just need to realize it.
I spent the last few days in the forest, fasting in silence. By creating this space, I realized how the mechanism of the ego (mind) works — always searching for something, never present.
This inner voice that charges you, demands of you, it comes in the form of: "I have too much to do", "I want to be recognized", "I want to please others", comparing deeds in an idealistic way, the child that wants to please, perfectionist, guilty, "I'm wasting time", "would have, could have, should have", "I need to be", wanting confrontation.
Upon noticing this voice, you will see that it is not actually you, and this space (of peace) will dissolve it. By putting focus and attention on this inner peace, it strengthens you. This process is also called meditation. By focusing ourselves on being present in each interaction, we perceive what irritates us, what makes us anxious, sad, angry.
We live in abundance if we have food, shelter and friends, but we still suffer. This suffering only ends with an internal choice and a decision to prioritize peace over regrets, grudges, anxiety, judgments and denied feelings.
Your mind will tell you these things when X happens, or if Y has occurred or that Z is at fault for your frustration. This mechanism comes from our cognitive capacity and has brought us to where we are today. Be thankful for it and let it go. These thoughts are no longer needed on this new Earth.
Feel the ground, taste the food, be thankful for having a body, for nourishment, for breathing, walking, sight, having family and friends. Awaken gratitude: you have everything you need to be happy. Don't let the storm of thoughts about the past and future, of comparison and accusation, take away the only thing you really have: the present.
Awaken compassion. Compassion for yourself, knowing that this peace is already there and, with kindness and patience, you will reach it. Compassion for those close to you, for the ways of life you find along the way.
When you feel that the ego is taking away your peace, step back and observe: who is this obstinate being within you? Why does he not want you to have peace? Why war with yourself and with others? In the end, you will die someday. Live each second in peace, it's not worth it to feed misleading voices inside you that say you have to punish or save the world, always solve problems, suffer, blame, judge... They are creations of your mind and realizing that helps you to find peace.
All we seek is peace.
To breathe and give value to the air, give value for food, for being able to appreciate the immensity of nature. Step back and observe the silence in between thoughts. Everything that has happened brought you to where you are now. Give thanks. Be grateful for who you are, what you have, what you have lived. Whatever you want to change in yourself, you can. But you cannot change another person, or the past. This is a universal rule, just like gravity. So do not waste your energy on it.
What do you want to change in your life? What is preventing you from doing this? Who is it that you have to please, telling you that you are incapable, that there is no time? What would you do if money wasn't an issue and didn't have any pre-set commitments?
You don't owe anything to anyone. You still have time to find harmony with your past, your family, your friends and the most important thing is to find harmony with your present. Let the truth come out of the silence by calming your mind. With each interaction with the world, try to better something instead of complain. Be genuine with your essence and reveal yourself to the world.
We need you. You are important. Your inner peace is key to changing the world.
Compulsive thinking comes from desire and this makes you suffer. Here and now is all there is.
Planning is important and gives you direction and points you to your path. Go with gratitude and compassion.
Forgive yourself and forgive others, this will liberate you. If you cannot truly forgive yet, put on the intention: it is like planting a tree. Water it every day, I assure you it will bear fruit one day.
Take note of laziness, addictions and how they close you off from the world. Yes, we're all going to die one day. Yes, the past happened, but that doesn't stop you from living genuinely happy here and now. Smile, share, help wherever you can, without charging for it. You could always do more or better, but don't suffer because of that.
Live the spontaneity of your youth. Pray for the happiness of others. If you cannot do so right now, plant the seed and water it.
Don't live addicted to the clock, TV, cellphone, computer. They are just boxes with buttons and colors. Keep your body healthy, strong and in shape, but do not push perfection on yourself. Nourish yourself as healthily as you can, but do not push perfection on yourself.
Always seek to know more. The path to self-discovery is infinite and will increase the permanence of your inner peace.
There are very strong mechanisms of physical and emotional addictions that you have to deal with. It's no use to simply pray or blame yourself. The world needs your conscious action.
Writing what you feel helps you to see. Spend more time in nature. Experiment not doing or wishing something and seeing what happens to you. Let go of the need to get somewhere: try to be present and attentive to everything you do. Try to prioritize and plan your day, but not over-plan your life.
Synchronicities and mysterious coincidences are the way life talks to you. Happiness depends on you receiving it and taking the first step, the universe will help you.
Seek to be more authentic and not to please others.
The air you breathe and your beating heart are yours. What excites you? What stops you from being yourself? What gives you immediate pleasure but makes you suffer soon after?
Meditating is different than thinking about a problem. Let thought go and perceive that thoughts are just thoughts. The real world is beautiful, full of life, love and abundance.
Focus on inner peace, it is there inside you. Remove the obstacles and don't be fooled into believing you have to save the world. Entering into peace, you will already be doing your part, because peace leads to more peace, it inspires and transforms.
What you search for on the outside, you already have inside.
From Big Sur, California — written after a three day fast in nature.